If You Didn’t Know The World Is Full Of Married Men You Will Know Now

Once upon a time, circa 1968, Muvah Jackie Collins dropped her classic bestselling indie debut novel entitled The World Is Full Of Married Men. After being challenged by her husband to finish the novel (the late great Tramp owner Oscar Lerman) who found her half completed manuscript and thought it was really good, she finished it. But the tea of it is that Muvah Collins mailed a handwritten manuscript on legal paper (in the good old days when you could do that) to a publisher she picked from her own book collection (have fucking mercy for the simpler times), and received a whopping 400 pounds (which by 1968 standards still wasn’t shit) for her efforts! Over 200K copies were sold in two weeks, and it went on to launch her film career as a writer/producer.

This is the grandmother of Zero Fucks Given Literature. For all of you that are not initiated, Muvah Collins was that chick that was brave enough to talk about fucking and nothing but fucking and lust and all that good shit from a woman’s perspective; up until her debut novel only men wrote about such lustful carnal passions with a complete insensitivity that wasn’t even real on what they thought women felt in sexual manners (looking at you Harold Robbins).

A few notes before we get down to the nitty gritty:

One, I am reviewing the re-released edition that Muvah Collins put out after her deal with Harper Collins ended in the 2000s. Since I haven’t read the OG version since high school, right hand to Gawd I can’t remember if anything changed but I do know a few things were cleaned up in the editing, so keep that in mind.

Two, for those of you fortunate to have seen the film, that is not a straight adaptation. Muvah Collins took a lot of liberties and completely changed the ending of the book and a lot of the sub plots relevant to the story to make the film more sensationalized than the novel. There is also a 10 year age gap between the book/film, so think of the film as a disco flick and the novel a steamy swinging sixties tale.

Three, it’s a pocket paperback that’s under 200 pages, so it’s more of a novella than a novel.

Alright now…here we fucking go!

The World Is Full Of Married Men takes us down the wanton harlot path of an ensemble cast that would make All My Children fans blush. At the proverbial married man helm of this novel is David Cooper. David’s a British television executive and in house producer at a production company, sixth in line to be at the top of the company and a cad about town. He uses his position to get plenty of ass around London, since it is a perk of the job. He’s married to Linda, his 30 yr old wife of ten years, who he treats more like his servant than his domestic partner. She’s the typical suburban June Cleaver housewife whose husband wouldn’t think of letting her work because her job is to take care of their two kids and oversee the maid cleaning all day so he can control her down to the last quid. Welcome to marriage in the 1960s.

David, who is a piece of shit and a half thinking he’s Gawd’s gift to women, slings enough dick until he finds his match in his ad campaign model Claudia Parker. He just cannot get enough of this 22 yr old; dude is lost and sprung the hell out at the barely legal gushy bushy she putting down on him whenever and wherever she wants it. That 2 Live Crew snatch she got has David hot in the London streets, careless as hell and thirsty trying to knock them walls out whenever the opportunity presents itself. Problem is, he’s in denial that Claudia’s looser than a stretched out rubber band on a Booty Collins tour, fucking everything everywhere all at once around London’s greatest casting couches so she can be a star.

As David juggles lying to his old and undesirable wife (whom he married as a virgin, by the way) that he only lays around Christmas, his lust gets the better of him trying to dominate Claudia so she can be totally dependent on him in every facet, from her career to her finances so he can turn the happy hooker into his new housewife.

A few things happen as a consequence; one, Linda tips out on her own in a short-lived but good dick down fling robbing the cradle with Paul, a 22 yr old cat she met as a protest rally that reinvigorates her independence. Two, Claudia gets caught up with Conrad, a hot film producer who is part-time sadistic freak and old randy swinger who uses his position into having the most sought after casting couch for up and coming actresses and then Giles, her play brother photographer who manipulates her free nature to make his future fortune.

David, who just can’t leave well enough alone, leads the pack into an inevitable collision course as he spirals out of control, which leads the ensemble getting their just desserts and happy endings where it is applicable.

That’s about all I can say without giving away key details in the book you should read.

Muvah Collins kicked the door in and took the bruises that followed for chicks like me to write risqué, and for that reason alone you should read it. Did it age well, not exactly but it isn’t terrible; the main plots and countless subplots are easy to keep up with as long as you take into consideration its set in the swinging sixties. If anything, it’s a historical fiction piece now that looks into antiquated marital relations and why gender issues, especially within a marriage, needed a good change.

The World Is Full Of Married Men is the type of book you read to say, ‘well, damn’!